thoughts of this Mom...

May 17, 2013- On a date with Emma and Joseph at one of Emma's favorite restaurants, "Olive Garden". She loves their Zuppa Toscana.

Emma

Lately I have been trying to really hold on to these special moments with all my children, especially my Little Emma as she is growing SO fast before my eyes. 

I feel her independence increasing. It's a good thing.

Little, yes I want her to stay little FOREVER. I love seeing her imagination run wild, hosting tea parties with her dolls, still calling herself Queen or Princess 'so and so' (depending on the day), ALL her questions on a daily basis, caring for whatever toy is her favorite that day (unicorn, baby doll, moonlight cat, monkey and so on)...but mostly her innocence. 

I love her innocence.

This little gal enters the Kindergarten world in the fall. 

She is SO ready academically and socially. She has been ready since last fall but I'm grateful I had another year with her. 

I won't lie, I feel anxiety when I think about her starting Kindergarten. I know I shouldn't but do.  

I don't want her innocence taken away.

I don't want her to face those upcoming challenges; they will come. But there will also come beautiful experiences as well. 

I have to keep telling myself, "they have to learn and grow..they have to learn and grow."

I go to bed at night thinking about my children and evaluating my day with them. Some days I feel guilt like I could have done better and some days I'm a little more content, still some guilt, and feel completely exhausted. :) 

I have to remind myself that I need to settle down. I need to have those simple and quiet moments with them.

I feel like these moments will drift just a little bit after Emma starts Kindergarten. Will they? I don't know.

 Emma will only be 5 years old once, Thomas will only be 3 years old once, and Joseph will only be this little for another day, he just keeps getting bigger daily.

I just pray that my children will have confidence in who they are and that Derek and I have helped them recognize that and will continue to help them feel that in themselves. I hope.

These have been on my mind the last week or so about Emma. Some of it may not make sense but my mind is racing. :) 

She is growing up SO fast and will be entering kindergarten in a couple months. I know she's ready, but am I? :)